LOVE GALORE

whew what a day yesterday was…

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On days like yesterday I like to ask myself. What does love really mean? Is it really physical touch and gifts? Is it just the thought of having someone to keep us from reverting to our lonely selves? is it really just the deep affection we feel for someone who’s been with us for a certain period of time? I always think back to this verse for comfort and true understanding of what love really is…

4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. ( 1 corinthians 13:4-7)

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Whether you are christian or not, this is the foundation of love. To me, Love is sacrifice. it’s putting someones happiness before your own without damaging yourself. If you are in a relationship with someone and you find your self impatient, rude, jealous, proud, keeping records of wrong, is it really true love? Love has its ups and downs, but if we aren’t focusing and basing our love on these principles, is it love at all? There are so many relationships that are built solely on lust and desires that shouldn’t be the base of any relationship, but our generation seems to be obsessed with the fact that it’s okay. It breaks my heart to see more and more marriages failing and it looks like it is getting to the point where marriage might not be the goal after all, when it should be the primary focus. Love isn’t something that is easy to describe, in my experience it’s not easy at all. At a young age it’s hard to describe what Love is or to even comprehend the complexity of it, but all I know is that It’s something we all can’t live with out. The anticipation of loving someone for the rest of your life, or even learning to love the people right down your street, is definitely not as easy task, but it is not hard to take a step in the right direction.

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Outfit details

Long-sleeved black shirt: Aritzia

Jeans: Garage

Fur coat: Garage

That’s my mind on Love right now, I’m only 16 so hey what do I really know? Hope you guys enjoyed this post, I see y’all in my next post :))

xoxoSJ

MY SAFE HAVEN

Here I am again with an abundance of thoughts and lo and behold, I’m surprisingly typing them all out to this little outlet I call my safe haven. I call this platform my safe haven because I truly can jump onto my computer and write out my feelings like I never have dreamed of saying out loud to someone sitting right next to me. To all those who know me may read that and think It’s a complete lie, but trust me. This Blog is made for me to be Me, and If i’m not myself here, where else would I be. In society where my parents are expecting me to be one thing, and friends are expecting me to be another, without something to myself ( and JESUS), my life would be in absolute shambles as of now.

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I keep on pondering the different routes I want to take this blog. Do I want to keep it extremely professional and just post about fashion related topics, or do i want to branch out and create different sections so that my voice is heard in the various ways I decide it should be heard. Judging by the fact that I am a 16 year old confused child, I’ll probably go with my inner gut when the time is right. For now be prepared to hear everything because this is my brain, this is my safe haven. If I can come here and feel safe, that’s all that matters to me. When life is throwing rocks at me to crumble into a being I refuse to be, I will find my confidence back here and I promise you guys that.

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I know I Know I talk and apologize about being inconsistent here, but do you guys wanna know the truth? I honestly get an overflow of ideas to the point where I am stuck. I see so many influencers on instagram on a daily basis that sometimes It’s hard to hear my true calling from God and my true purpose. Some things are clear, but others get pushed to the back of my mind like dust in a filled closet. With all that said, I am promising you guys more content this year, and if I don’t? maybe this is the year I will truly be set on the path of what I want to do and who knows where that will take me. For now, my goal is to stay true to who I am, and press in to the person God has called me to be. I love you all.

xoxo Sj

8 LESSONS I TOOK FROM 2018

It’s finally the end of the year, was it just me or was the first half of the year really slow, and suddenly flew past near the end? Maybe it’s just me.

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SO Yes. I’m back, I need to stop starting every post by apologizing for not being active ( sorry tho! ). As you can see from the title, I am sharing the 8 things I truly learnt in 2018. I wouldn’t call this year a bad year because this year was definitely a year of life changing experiences and situations that broke me but also helped me grow into a stronger individual.

Before I get into the 10 things I learnt, I hope you guys take today to reflect on the year and think about what you can do better for next year, as cliche as it sounds. It’s so easy to say, “ I’m gonna cut out all the fakes”, and all these goals that aren’t necessarily going to happen overnight. Instead we should make goals that we can actually start now. We should make goals that we know are things we and work towards and improve ourselves with.

Okay i’m done. Let’s hop right in.


Don’t Be Materialistic

Okay so I learnt about this a lot this year when I went on a missions trip to Mexico. I was given the opportunity to go out and help kids and help them grow in their faith. By building a house for a family along with my team, and donating food and other supplies to them, we flew in with the idea that they will be the most impacted, but that wasn’t the case. I left that trip realizing how much we depend on money, and accumulating clothes, etc, to try and make us happy. I saw the little kids in Mexico who were beaming with joy because they had each other, they had their friends, and they didn’t need anything else and that was one of the biggest lessons I learnt this year. There's no point accumulating everything in the world, if in the end we aren’t happy.

Don’t depend on others for your own happiness

Okay this one is pretty simple. Sis. Bro. whoever is reading this. I cannot stress enough how important it is not to depend on others to make you happy. People WILL fail you. That’s honestly just how life goes. I have learnt to be happy and content with myself, because I have seen that people will leave and I’m not just going to let my happiness leave with them so, it’s important to be content with ourselves and who we are.


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Someone will always not like you for no reason

This one I realized the hard way and it’s just a fact. SOMEONE WON’T LIKE YOU. Someone will always want what you have. They may envy you, want your intelligence, friends, they probably don’t even want to see you succeed, but going into 2019 I realized that it’s not worth stressing over these people. As long as your mind is on the right path and you are focused on your goals, You will be all good :)

When you are working on big things, work in secret

I learnt this after watching a sermon by one of my favourite pastors, Michael Tod, and he talked about how when you are called to success, you will be called in secret. You don’t have to share it to the whole world right away because remember, NOT EVERYONE WANTS TO SEE YOU SUCCEED. I am someone who loves to share my plans and successes with everyone but this year I am taking a step back and working in silence and with a trusted group of people.

A word of encouragement to anyone goes a long way

This was for sure something big I learnt this year. When you see someone, say hi, tell them they look good, encourage them. You never know what someone is going through, You never know what’s going on in their head or at home. I am someone who always wants to make sure everyone is okay and I hate to see people upset, so if I can say something little to make someones day just a little better, I will.


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The more you humble yourself, the more you will be lifted up

This one is just something everyone should know. This is something I have seen and it’s actually true. Like I know sometimes I am not the humblest person but towards the end of the year I realized that If you aren’t a servant to others, you will never be seen higher, or to simplify that, you will never be given respect. I have seen my dad especially serve others whole heartedly and people have no problem honouring him when it’s his birthday because he has spent so much time serving others and that’s one of the biggest goals for me this year and one of the biggest pieces of advice I wanted to share with you guys.

If your identity isn’t fully found in God, you will never be satisfied

This one is just something I’ve learnt over the years since if you didn’t know already, I’m a christian, and I used to struggle with where I found my identity. I used to find my identity in how much money I had, who my friends were, what I was wearing and all that added up to nothing. All these things left me feeling lonely, and tired and obviously just broken. I realized that If my identity isn’t found in God, the one who calls me his own, the one who made me and knows me in and out, I will never be satisfied with the world and who I aspire to be.

Taking risks won’t cost you anything

Now this brings me to my very last point and this one is just to TAKE RISKS. Honestly, think about it, what is there to lose? Nothing. That’s the answer. This year I took a leap and published this blog and sometimes It’s hard but It’s a risk I took and I don’t regret it . So, if you have a plan or business idea, why not start it? This may be your year :)

SO That’s the end of my lessons from 2018. I have a BIG ANNOUNCEMENT to make soon this year and I am so excited to share it wish you guys!! ( it’ll be more for the people in Vancouver )

HAPPY NEW YEAR

xoxo Sj

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FUTURISTIC THOUGHTS II 010

This is me stepping up my game and posting more outfits, you’re welcome.

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As you all know, I am 16 and a junior in high school, This means my future is coming up fast. Sometimes I feel like I have it all together and I know what I want to do for sure, but recently that’s all changed. I have always been so scared of going for my dreams of working solely in the fashion industry even if it’s not what my parents are others want for me. It’s kinda scary, following your dreams. I think thoughts like what if i don’t succeed? what if my parents were right? should I have become a doctor all along?

I was having a little chat with my dad and I asked him a really good question. I asked if he wakes up happy to work everyday. He told me how much he loves what he does and advised me that it’s my life and I should do what I know will make me happy in the future. I was always scared of asking my dad, I really don’t know why. Maybe it was the feeling of thinking he would be disappointed in me, but look how that turned out!

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My advice to anyone who feels the needs to go against their passion to impress others is stop. Its your life! You should be able to follow your dreams, BE A RISK TAKER, live out your passion and most importantly to be happy. I know it sounds super cliche but TRUST ME, you will be happy in the end. I am not saying I suddenly have my whole life figured out but, it’s definitely a step in the right direction.

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Hope you guys enjoyed todays post! Let me know if you don’t like it or love it more when I include stuff in my personal life in my posts, I honestly just feel the need to encourage people out there and help them if they are going through any hard times. If you guys ever need anyone to talk to remember I am always there :))))

A PERFECT PLAN

11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
— Jeremiah 29:11

There is a lot about timing about life that we don’t understand. Why do good people die? Why are the people we love taken away from us? Why can’t the way we want our lives to look like work out? Over these past couple of weeks I have battled with understanding perfect timing since a lot of situations in my life started to go off-side.

I started to question God and my faith in him, as to why things in my life that seemed so perfect, went wrong. I didn’t understand why everyone would tell me.. ”It’s okay Stella, it’s God’s plan”. Why would a God who loves us make us sad. I struggled with this for a couple of days. After talking to a lot of my friends and older mentors, I realized it was all part of a perfect plan.

I wanted to make this post to encourage everyone because I feel like we all go through hardships in life and we start to question our existence and why things go wrong. I have come to understand that things happen for a reason. You might go through family, financial, social and many other issues, but it always happens for a reason. It makes us stronger. God wouldn’t give you anything he knows you can’t handle. It might happen to strengthen your relationship with others or even with your relationship with God himself.

When things go wrong, we shouldn’t overly stress ourselves about them. We should’t spend days crying about them. We should try and focus on the brighter side no matter how hard it may be. One day, you will look back and see these situations as things that happened to make you a better and stronger person.

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New york necklace: Aldo

Flower necklace: Forever 21

Rings: Forever 21

xoxo Sj

BEING THANKFUL

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!!

Just in case you are in another country, it’s thanksgiving out here in Canada! There are a lot of things and people I am thankful for in my life, so being me, I decided to write a little letter to each of the different categories of people in my life that have brought me here and made me the person I am today. If you read my old blog you probably remember my post like this from last year and that also means you are a real one and I love you. Let’s get started..

Dear God,

There are a lot of things I am thankful for but you are the most important. You created me, my world, my surroundings, put me in a loving home with a good family, blessed me with all my friends and you do so much more. Even though life gets hard and I start to blame you and wonder why you do different things in my life, I have learnt to trust you. I have learnt to put my trust in you because I know that everything happens for a reason. Thank you for your everlasting love that overwhelms me everyday. Im very grateful

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Dear Family,

We may have our ups and downs, since there are 7 of us, but I love you all so much. You guys are my rock and my foundation. I know you guys will never leave me no matter how hard I may make you upset. You also encourage me to reach for dreams and to be the best version of me I can be and for that I’m very grateful.

Dear Friends,

The people I basically see everyday. The people who make me laugh until I cry. You guys have seen me on my best days and you have seen me on some of my worst days. Without you I don’t know where I would be today. You guys are the most solid group of people I know and the most beautiful people inside and out as well. I am forever grateful for you guys.

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To all those who failed me,

You guys hurt me. Probably made me stay up nights crying about different situations. I don’t hold anything against you guys. There aren’t a lot of you. I just wanted you to know that without you hurting me I wouldn’t be the strong, confident woman I am today. I wouldn’t have this blog because I would be stuck in my insecure ways. I am grateful you gave me the opportunity to stand up and be myself. Thank you.

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To all of you who read my blog,

You guys don’t understand how much you mean to me. This blog is my baby, my true love. It’s something I could never have done when I was little. When life was hard, I wish i had a place to come to and talk about what I love and share what I cared about. To all you readers out there, whether you are 50 people or even a 1,000 , I hope you read this and are encouraged to live your life and carry out your dreams, whether that means starting a youtube channel, striving for your athletic goas, getting into that top school, I hope I encourage you to be confident in who you are and to genuinely be yourself. I’m really not anyone special, but if I can inspire at least one person my life goal is complete. I love you all and I’m forever grateful for you.

BEING A BLACK TEEN BLOGGER IN 2018

 

This post is more of a laid back, me talking kinda post. I don't want this blog to just consist of pictures but I want it to be a platform where I can speak and share my experiences throughout my life as I continue to grow into the woman I aspire to be in my society.

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Being a Black Teen Blogger in 2018. This is quite the title i've taken up on myself. It's changed my life in so many ways that I wish I could explain, especially the blogging factor. Blogging to me, if you haven't heard my story is my escape. It's my way of showing the world who I am without being fearful. I'm not saying I'm the most confident person in the world, because of course I get nervous about posting content, and of course I get a bit scared that I'll be judged but honestly when I think to the brighter side and think about God, and my family, and the people who support me theres nothing I can't do. 

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So, you might think what is it actually like to be a blogger at my age. It's not anything special. I'm basically just a normal black girl who loves fashion so posts about it. Do I get made fun of? A little bit but it's really not that drastic. There will be little comments here and there like " ooo its Stella the blogger", and of course it hurts me but then I look at them and realize they aren't doing anything beneficial with their life so I honestly move on. I love knowing that "hey, at least i'm putting myself out there for the things I love instead of trying to put others down."

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My advice to you if you is that if you believe you have a gift and you are scared to shine girl/guy go for it, cause no one does you than you do you and I really mean that. I hope you enjoyed this post and took some inspiration from it

xoxo Sj

SWEET SIXTEEN II 006

Yup it's true ya girl just turned sixteen!! I have learnt so much in my life after these past few years of living and I know that I still have so much to learn as well. Life has treated me well. Even though some friendships and relationships have had be swamped up in stress, I haven't stopped smiling. Even though I had to work hard and just to become half as confident as the woman I am today, I'm still smiling. I want the age 16 to be my year of picking my path (in quality). If I'm going to be a fashion blogger, I need to find my path, find my aesthetic and stay true to it. Sorry if this is long but I am honestly just thankful I made it this far in life already wow. OH and props to you if you made it through.

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Outfit details

Outfit 1 :

Tube top: dynamite

Mom jeans: Thrifted

Backpack: Thrifted

Shoes: Vans

Credits to my sister danielle :)

Outfit 2: I got all of these pieces so long ago sorry!

 

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I love you all!! 

xoxo Sj

WHY AM I OBSESSED WITH SELF LOVE?

Self Love, Self Love, Self Love. 

Self Love is something that is very dear to my heart becuase it is something I have struggled with growing up. Yes, being black definitely contributed too. No matter how many times other "Women of colour" have said it, we have all experienced being put down for how we look ( our race ).

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MY STORY...
When I first moved to Canada in Grade 5. I typically wasn't a shy kid, but when you move from an all black continent to being the only other black girl in your grade it was very hard. I didn't know who to be or how to act. I was a minority. Loving myself was out of the question. How could I love myself when I felt like no one was like me or no one liked me. I saw myself as an outsider, someone who could never be loved. This lead to me being lonely till about grade 7. In grade 7 I definitely started to try to be someone I wasn't and I'm guessing it was pretty obvious because I got called by the term a " wanna be " a lot. I wanted to be someone I wasn't. It was hard to admit back then, but now i definitely see what everyone meant. I could go on and on about how that affected me in the most negative ways but let's talk about how that relates to self love.

When i finally realized. I am worth it and that I was worth love, things changed. God took my life and spun it into something beautiful becuase I was no longer worthless in my eyes. I started to be me and do me for me. I started to care less of what people thought of me and my personality started to bloom again. Loving myself to me is freedom from what I used to go through. I literally felt like when people see me, a dark skinned girl, the immediately thought I was ugly or different but, eventually things changed. Us, women of colour have started to find a confidence that is currently being seen as intimidating and I find it beautiful.

 

My advice to you,

you might look down on yourself, you might think no one likes you, you might hate every single thing that makes you you. But i'm here to tell you that you're beautiful. You have so much potential and talent that you might not even know yet. Once you start to accept who you are instead of hating it, I promise you life will be better and you'll definitely be happier, trust me. :)

 

xoxo Sj

NEW YEAR NEW BLOG??

The goal is not to be successful, the goal is to be valuable. Once you are valuable, instead of chasing success, it will attract itself to you.
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Hey Everyone!

Today actually marks a year since the first day I went public with a blog!! You have probably noticed yes it wasn't with this platform it was with wixsite. I took a step back at my site and really didn't like how it looked. The layout, everything just didn't look like the blog/ platform I as a blogger wanted to showcase.

That's where this blog comes in. There are so many changes that I have for this blog. This blog is going to be a bit more personal and I will DEFINETLY try my best to be a bit more consistent with posting posts that are more quality and less rushed. I'm not going to make this post super long but i hope you all love this blog as much as I do and you read them LOL.

 

xoxo

 

 

xoxo